A Rugby man is selling his 's*** box' Corsa in a hilariously honest advert - and he will throw in half a bottle of polish for anyone wanting to try 'polishing a t**d'.
Anyone who has ever been to view a used car for sale will know how frustrating it can be to turn up to view a used vehicle - only to find that it is in far worse condition than described and you have wasted your time.
But in an endeavor to sell his cosmetically challenged 2002 Vauxhall Corsa, Rugby man Brett Sutton has elected to go for the brutally honest approach - with hilarious results.
In his Facebook Marketplace advert, titled: "A Ropey 1.2 Corsa sexy model if your eyesight is p*** poor," he wrote: "Anyone interested in buying a s*** box Corsa? It's as bad as it looks, and absolutely filthy!"
Having covered 127,000 miles, the car is certainly past the first flush of youth - but it does have full service history and an MOT until August 9.
Why has the car covered all those miles? Mr Sutton believes: "It's been around loads of Maccy D's and youth clubs."
At a mere £200 the car will not break the bank, but those who drive a hard bargain might be even more tempted by some free extras.
Mr Sutton wrote: "It has a Haynes manual for a Corsa B that's no relevance to this model and half a bottle of Colour Magic if you fancy having a crack at polishing a t**d."
Anyone is welcome to come for a viewing - but those planning on coming to point out faults with the car are advised: "You will only receive a slow and condescending clap, for pointing out the obvious that the car is proper sh**."
Mr Sutton bought the Corsa to fill a gap when he was left without a car. He planned to eventually sell it to his ex-partner so she could use it to learn to drive.
But Mr Sutton's ex-partner stopped learning to drive, and Mr Sutton ended up using the car for work for around six months.
Explaining the car's unique aesthetic, Mr Sutton said: "I work in recycling as a manger at a local skip company, so the car spends it days in a dirty environment, collecting drivers, visiting sites and generally just used as a workhorse, hence why the car looks rough as toast."
Those tempted to arrange a viewing can click here to see the advert. But you had better be quick - it has garnered 20 messages from interested parties.
This is not Mr Sutton's first foray into brutally honest car sales - in an advert for a modified Rover Metro he placed for sale for £350 he wrote: "It's earned the name 'Bonnie Tyler' as every now and then it falls apart."
Speaking about his adverts, Mr Sutton said: "The Metro one has been deemed the greatest by some publications and the worst ever by the Independent.
"Either way I shifted a truly awful car and the buyer was happy."
As well as giving people a good laugh, Mr Sutton's unique method of advertising has clever reasoning behind it.
He said: "Its not uncommon for me to advertise things this way, reason I do it is because the humour generates likes and comments.
"This then bumps the post to the top of the Facebook page meaning the advert looks after itself and you're getting a good coverage of potential purchasers of the item you're selling.
"If they don’t like it, then people with tell you on the post thus bumping it back up. So you win either way."
So what is the next chapter in Mr Sutton's automotive adventures? He said: "The car is being replaced with another old snotter, but a posh old snotter being a Mercedes estate.
"This is far more useful for work purposes, and I don’t need to keep nicking the wife’s Mercedes when visiting potential customers."
Having previously owned a classic Volkswagen Beetle, he added: "Hopefully in the future when time allows I will get me another classic, but until then its just me and the snotters I’m afraid."